(yes this is a completely irrelevant photo to what i'm going to say.)
i don't know about you, but i know cases like that with people around me - when you had too much fun when you were young, so much that it died off the moment you decided to take slow turn in life. well, it could be a slow turn, a fail u-turn or whatever. you know... when you feel like you've aged although you've not, everything is a fucking bore to you.
say, you got out of the fast lane, took a slow turn - everything becomes well, slow. everything becomes boring. for example, you grew out of going to clubs, you grew out of being drunk, you grew out of having whacky crazy fun, you grew out of stealing from convenient shops which have no cameras installed, you grew out of going out, you grew out of stealing candies, you grew out of cutting classes, you grew out of every fun that you used to love when you were younger.
it has happened to my boyfriend.
now it's happening to me. i just feel like i've been going out and doing whatnots since i was able to go out. like... 12. and now doing everything again seems so tiring. so fucking boring. i mean, haven't we been to clubs? isn't it just the same old fucking thing? what if you get caught stealing candies?
and... why do we always have to go out all the time? staying at home is good bitches.
plus it's not just about the dullness that's gonna set in, it's about the fear of doing whackshit stuff and then the fear of GETTING CAUGHT. because when you're older you just naturally fear every single fucking thing.
we had balls, man, we had balls when we were young. i mean i still have, but not as big as before. i am still a little bit brave but not as brave as i used to be. i am still a screw up but before, i was a GIANT screw up...
do you guys feel this way? fuck, i'm only 20 and all i wanna do is to work and stay at home, play with my dog... i'm okay with being alone, you know. i mean yeah i do go out sometimes... have a bit of fun but i don't think i'll go back to who i used to be.
looking forward. xoxo.
